What is the ideal bdsm relationship? 什麼是理想的BDSM關係呢？

文｜主人

Over the years I've been in bdsm, I've come across many different types of relationships inside of bdsm.
好多年以來，我遊走在不同型態的BDSM關係裡。

Some people live a purely bdsm life, as only a dom and sub, they have no contact with each other outside of this role, others live a more blended lifestyle, they live together and act as a 'normal' couple but integrate bdsm into their everyday lifestyle. There are the casual bdsm'ers, people who do it for fun as an extra to sex, and others who enjoy bdsm as bdsm with no connection to sex.
These are just some of the extremes I've encountered, there are many shades of grey between all of these and beyond.
看到有些人活在純粹的主/奴關係裡，在現實世界中和彼此毫無接觸。有些人則是結合了主/奴與一般的情侶關係，在日常生活中參揉進BDSM的成份。而有些人只是偶爾將BDSM當做是增加情趣的前戲，另外有些人則是單純享受BDSM而無關乎性。

What makes a good bdsm relationship though? Should a dom be restricted to a single sub? Should a sub join a harem of other subs? Ultimately, thats up to the people that are playing. But one thing that I have learned about bdsm that is absolutely essential regardless of what form your bdsm relationship takes.
不管是什麼樣的BDSM關係，如何才能維繫的好呢？是一個主只能有一個固定的奴嗎？還是奴必須學會接受主人擁有許多的奴？我認為其實全看個人的喜好。但有一件事我認為不管對哪種主/奴關係而言，都是最根本的條件，那就是－－

Communication.
溝通

If the communication isn't there, the relationship isn't there. Simple as that.
如果沒有彼此溝通，那麼關係就不存在，簡單來說就是如此。