Punishment and Pleasure 處罰與愉悅，總是一體兩面

Evelyn: "Tell me something"
Cynthia: "There's so many things to tell you.

Far too many things.
But I can start with
how much I love you...
and how happy I am
that you're here with me.
How happy I am..."

Evelyn: "Talk about the other things."
Cynthia: "I'm not happy with you at all."
Evelyn: "Really?"
Cynthia: "Really."
Evelyn: "What have I done?"
Cynthia: "It's what you haven't done.
You haven't been a good maid.

...

You're mine now."

Evelyn: "Keep talking.
Say something else."

Cynthia: "You haven't washed my panties recently.
Nor have you polished my boots.
If you want to be a good maid,
you have to do these things a lot more.
Otherwise, you'll be punished."

~ The Duke of Burgundy
（喜歡BDSM人士都應該看的口袋片單）

電影中的Evelyn

不愛聽愛人Cynthia說我愛你

只愛聽她說自己是個多不乖巧的女僕

還有那麼多事情沒有做到令她滿意
這樣的自己是多麼值得被處罰
聽著聽著
Evelyn竟就達到高潮了

愉悅，
很多時候是伴隨著處罰而來的
處罰產生的苦痛
因而有著其獨特的價值

愛服侍

今晚，她只是一個提供服務的道具
沒有足夠自信的她
從來就不認為自己
可以用性感撩人的姿態達成主人的期待

但至少
她可以這麼
以口來服侍主人

(photo from https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/29/71/21/297121135d1855f22e6cccbb8fb65bdb.jpg)

脫了殼再進來

像是一個儀式般

穿越日光下喧鬧的街區人群

走入深深的巷子底

淺入地底秘境

在黑暗裡退下包覆自己的那些矯情與不真實

透過赤裸或其他更足以展現自我的媒介

將或許猙獰或許懦弱或許狂妄或許激動的情緒直接宣洩出來

主人正甩著鞭子抽打跪在籠子上的寵物

籠子裡眷養了另一隻女孩

女孩露出籠子的頭被上方我們的寵物緊緊揪著頭髮

女孩的主人坐在女孩前方的高腳凳上

甩著女孩巴掌

對了

不久前女孩還瑟縮在籠子裡的某個角落

屁股被塗抹了足夠的潤滑後塞入肛塞

我一手拿著調酒

一手不時安撫著面前寵物被打的發燙的乳頭或屁股

一面心中想著

在杯光晃影中

一切看來如此正當與美好

身上的某部份不再屬於自己

身體被有些粗暴的鎖上了一個巨大的衝突的物件

在主人堅持鎖上的同時

她訝異地睜大了眼睛

心裡著實覺得受了委屈

像是不被信任、從此不能為自己做主

她低頭看著這個陌生的新朋友

從此做任何事時都無法不感受到這塊外來物的覆蓋

像在不斷提醒著她

誰才是這個pussy的支配者

她輾轉難眠

也曾試圖用力的拉扯掙扎

卻沒有辦法改變身體不再屬於自己的這個現實

只能慢慢學習服從適應

並真心期待每個她被允許與鎖上的自己團聚的時刻

(photo from https://i.imgur.com/AdKlfFB.png)

【轉載＆翻譯】六種損毀主奴關係的S常犯錯誤 （第六條--不夠投入）

Original by: Jessica Cocker 翻譯：莉莉絲 

6.不夠投入 

在非必要的時候選擇超時工作而非準時回家晚餐、在m沒有做錯事時急躁的對待她，或著很顯然地忽視她，這些都是不夠投入的例子。一個m需要感覺到自己的價值。她需要被保證她是令她的S愉悅且有用的。她需要在不變的管教下藉由取悅與服侍主人，來表達自己的順從天性。而這麼做的她，該贏得值得你注意、尊重與投入情感的權力。被忽視的話，一個m就無法感覺到安全與被保護，她可能會因此變得不滿足、不快樂，甚至憂鬱起來。

你應該這麼做 

即使你有無數的工作或其他雜務等待你完成，絕不要忽視你的m或著是這段關係。切割出固定給她的時間，一起看部電影或是允許她陶醉地謙卑地待在你的腳下。允許她性感地取悅你。她需要你的投入。她需要你教導她什麼是她該做的，以及她該如何做到你的期待。更重要的是，她需要你不忘記提醒她，自己的真實角色—你的寶貴持有物。

6.  Not Being Engaged – Choosing to make a habit of working late when you don’t have to over getting home regularly in time for dinner, being irritable or short with her when she has done nothing wrong, or just plain ignoring your submissive are all examples of not being fully engaged.  A submissive woman needs to feel valued.  She needs reassurance that she is pleasing and useful.  She needs a consistent conduit through which she can express her submissive nature by obediently serving and pleasing her Dom.  Her gift of submission earns her the right to feel you consider her worthy of your attention, respect, and affection.  A submissive can’t feel centered, safe, and protected if neglected.  She is likely to become dissatisfied, unhappy, and even depressed.

What to do instead: Even if you’ve got a packed work schedule or other matters that require your attention, don’t neglect your submissive or the relationship.  Aim to schedule regular blocks of time dedicated to her.  Watch a movie together and allow her to revel in occupying her humble place at your feet.  Allow her to pleasure you sexually.  She needs your engagement.  She needs you to teach her what she must do, how she must behave, and most importantly she needs you to remind her who and what she really is, your valued possession.

文章出處：6 Ways to Ruin Your Submissive

【轉載＆翻譯】六種損毀主奴關係的S常犯錯誤 （第五條--建立壞榜樣）

Original by: Jessica Cocker 翻譯：莉莉絲

5. 建立壞榜樣

有些時候m可能覺得一點都沒有順從的意願，同樣的，有些時候S也不想要擔任支配者的角色。這是人性，但是身為一個領導者，帶領著這樣一段主奴關係，你必須負起自己的責任，提供監察、引導、訓練，即便這週的工作如此緊張忙碌、或著是生活中有其他事情正在發生使你倍感疲倦。就如同你對於你的m有著期待與需求，你的m也對你有著期待與需求。像是你應該總是積極引領。如果辜負了你對她的責任，就是為這段關係設下了壞榜樣。如果你無法一貫性的負起你的責任，如果你不能做到許下的承諾，如果你為自己找藉口，如果你只是光說一口S的話語卻不練，你的行為將表現出你是怎樣的人。如果你以為你的m不會注意到，那你就錯了，如果她時常感到你不嚴肅看待自己的責任，那麼她終將也會模仿你的行為。

你應該這麼做

在你的m面前立下一個好榜樣，不要讓其他的事暫停你身為她S的責任，給予這段關係所值得的，一貫的注意力。

5. Set a Bad Example – Some days a submissive may not feel all that submissive and likewise some days a Dom doesn’t feel like exercising dominance.  That is just human nature but as the leader, the guiding force in the relationship, a Dom just can’t ignore his responsibility to provide guidance, supervision, and training just because it has been a hectic week at the office or he has a lot of other things on his plate and feels tired.  Just as you have expectations of your submissive like following rules and meeting needs you have, she has needs to be met and expectations of you as well.  You should always strive to lead by example.  Not living up to your responsibilities to her and the relationship sets a bad example.  If you don’t fulfill your responsibilities on a consistent basis, if you don’t keep your word, if you make excuses, if you talk the dominant talk but don’t walk the walk, your actions will speak louder than words.  You’re wrong if you think your submissive isn’t paying attention.  If she senses you don’t take your responsibilities seriously she is likely to mimic your behavior if exposed to it frequently.

What to do instead: Resolve to be a model example in front of your submissive.  Don’t let competing interests prevent you from addressing the needs of your submissive and from giving the relationship the consistent attention it deserves.

文章出處：6 Ways to Ruin Your Submissive

迫不及的人就先看看原文吧。

【轉載＆翻譯】六種損毀主奴關係的S常犯錯誤 （第四條--不挑戰她的極限）

Original by: Jessica Cocker 翻譯：莉莉絲 

4.不挑戰她的極限–如果要選出一項我覺得作為一個S身負的最關鍵責任，我想那就是創造一個適合m養成服從性的環境。要在這樣的生活型態中成長，最佳的方式就是把她推向極限、拓展她的領域。特別是有許多初來乍到的新手女m，總是帶著一份長長的清單，羅列了許多她缺乏嘗試的興趣或著是單純不想試的大小限制。許多這些限制是由於缺乏理解、自信或經驗，對嘗試某些活動感覺恐懼。主奴關係因為是互相的，所以限制必須被尊重。一個m永遠都不該被強迫從事某項她已經表明為「限制」的活動，但是在一些可以被挑戰的限制上，m必須被施加壓力去面對。當一個m表明一些限制是軟性的限制時，她並不是說自己絕對不願意在任何情況下去嘗試這件事。她只是在說這件事還不應該發生，或著是在這件事發生前你應該先與她討論。因此重視這些軟性的限制其實更能幫助她成長和超越自己的界線。如果S永遠不鼓勵她超越她的限制，她就不會成長，或至少不會那麼有效的成長，甚至會阻礙她發現自己的潛能。她可能會變得太過安逸於現況，並且拒絕接觸那些能幫助她成長的事情。

你應該這麼做

告訴你自己的興趣當然是非常重要的，所以你必須及早問她，但絕不要滿足於她給你的那份冗長慾望清單。如果她連和你討論那些有一點令她不安或害怕嘗試的事情都不願意的話，或許她還沒有完全準備好接受這種生活型態。她必須有成長的渴望和願意嘗試與經驗那些最終能讓她成長的事物。不過或許更為重要的是，你必須有意願鼓勵她嘗試這些新事物。

4.  Don’t Push Her Limits – If I had to pick out the most critical responsibility that every Dom has toward a submissive, it would be to ensure that he creates an environment where she can grow in her submission.  Growth in the lifestyle is best affected by helping her to push her limits and expand her boundaries.  Especially with novice submissive women, quite often they come into the lifestyle with a veritable laundry list of limits both soft and hard, things she is either reluctant or simply unwilling to try.  Many of those limits are due to lack of understanding, lack of confidence, lack of experience, or feeling intimidated by the very thought of trying some activities.  Since D/s is always consensual, limits must always be respected.  A submissive should never be coerced or forced to participate in an activity that she has disclosed as a limit, but especially when it comes to soft limits, they do need to be pushed.  When a submissive says some activity is a soft limit, she isn’t saying she absolutely won’t ever do the activity under any circumstances.  She is saying not yet or that she needs for you to discuss it with her before she is asked to do it.  Thus, soft limits are especially fertile ground for expanding her boundaries and helping her to grow.  If her Dom never encourages her to push her limits, she won’t grow, at least efficiently and perhaps it may prevent her from every realizing her real potential.  She can become too comfortable with the status quo and even become resistant to attempting what is necessary to grow.

What to do instead:  It is important and proper to want you submissive to tell you what interests her and so you need to ask her that very early on but never be satisfied with her just giving you a lengthy list of all the things she wants done to her.  If she is reluctant to even discuss trying things that she finds a little intimidating or scary that you need from a relationship then perhaps this lifestyle isn’t really for her.  She needs to have a desire to grow and a willingness to do what is needed to experience it.  But perhaps even more importantly you need to have the will to encourage her to try new things so she can grow.

文章出處：6 Ways to Ruin Your Submissive

迫不及的人就先看看原文吧。